Saying Goodbye, Again

So, to go through the loss of your three cats that you've had for 16 to 19 years, then turn around and lose a baby kitten, no older than 3 and a half months old after only a week of knowing him, well, let's just say that it's not something I ever want to do again in my life. Losing Charmer was perhaps harder than, no, it was harder than losing any other pet I've ever lost. I barely knew him, but I loved him, dearly. He had stolen my heart in an instant, and he'll always have that chunk of it that he took.

Charmer was a bright happy kitten the day we brought him home. He was fearless and all he wanted to do was explore the house. He was so calm and didn't even seem to notice the fact that there were two squealing little boys that just wanted to jump up and down every time they saw the kitties. He had a big house to explore, and by golly, he was going to explore it. We had brought the kittens into the play room with a child gate in the doorway, to keep them in and the boys out, but Charmer decided he was having none of that and he climbed right over it! We discovered he liked to play in sinks, as you can see from a picture below.

The next day brought a different story. Charmer fell ill and we thought it was a simple cold, after all many of the kittens in the shelter had an upper respiratory virus, as Abby had, so we figured, no big deal, we'll get him some treatment and he'll be fine in a few days. How wrong we were. Within days he was deathly ill and we were fighting for his life. We did everything we could for him, sub-q fluids, assisted feedings, medication after medication, vet visit upon vet visit. Our vet said we'd done everything we possibly could, and unfortunately Charmer was resisting the heating pads and warming treatments that would warm his chilled body. My frisky little bright eyed boy aged to a fragile, weak shell of a cat within a week.

Sadly we knew that we had done all that we could and as shocking and unbelievable as the thought was, we had to let him go. It was incredibly difficult to lose one so young, so full of life, so eager to explore and so darn cute! I'll never know just why I had to lose Charmer to the calicivirus, what lesson exactly I was meant to learn; I can say it's an experience I don't ever want to have again.

I will never forget those bright eyes, that silver fur, those hugely long whiskers, or that adorable little trill that made me fall in love in an instant. I look forward to the time when I will see my Charmer again and will have an eternity to know him, to love him, and to share my love with him and all of my loved ones, both human and of the furry variety. Until then, there will be others to fill the void, but none will ever claim that little chunk of my heart that Charmer has stolen, for he was a special little cat. I wish I had known him longer.